


This is Not How I Want to Spend my Night

by HannibalsAngel



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Cute, Domestic Fluff, Edward Nygma - Freeform, Fluff, Housemates, Implied Relationship, M/M, No Spoilers, Nygmobblepot, One Shot, Oswald Cobblepot - Freeform, Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma - Freeform, Roommates, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-11
Updated: 2017-01-11
Packaged: 2018-09-16 17:47:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9283136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HannibalsAngel/pseuds/HannibalsAngel
Summary: Based off tumblr prompt: "this is not how I envisioned my day/night going". Oswald is that annoying roommate that tries to help but fails miserably, and after a few flame-filled accidenta, he decides to make it up to Ed.





	

**Author's Note:**

> First Gotham fic and probably my last?? Idk but Nygmobblepot is too fucking cute

"This is not how I envisioned my night," he said with a sigh. Ed was mopping up the water surrounding the toilet while Oswald fussed about in the kitchen. "You better not melt my spatula, Mr. Cobblepot." He spoke with a stern voice that was too stern, and it made him sound like a child giving their parent an ultimatum, "it'd be the third one this month, and I'd have to make you pay for it."  
      He rounded the corner and poked his head into the room, "Ed, I told you to call me Oswald; we're friends remember?" He gave an innocent, sweet smile and continued, "and I'm doing something important, so don't leave the bathroom."  
      "Fine, Oswald, please don't start another fire. How am I supposed to keep you hidden if the GCPD and GCFD keep coming over to put out a fire?" He chuckled almost evilly, and spoke mostly to himself, "I'm not at all clumsy, and I've never committed arson, so for me to start a fire? Not likely -"  
      "Ed where's the Vodka?"  
      He shot up, "I don't have any. Why do you -"  
      Glass broke, "don't worry I got it."  
      "Oswald -"  
      He limped quickly to the bathroom door and blocked Ed from leaving, "I told you not to leave."  
      "I need to see what you're up to."  
      He poked his shoulder with every word, "no, you, don't, now stay put. I promise everything is fine."  
      He pushed his glasses up and sighed, "fine, can you just give me a tiny detail on what you're doing?"  
      "Fine," he smiled sarcastically, "I can actually give you a riddle - what's hot and cold at the same time," he began. He looked around for the rest of it, "empties as it fills, and, uh," he shrugged, "I dunno, is destroyed faster than it's built."  
      Edward smiled and opened his mouth, but shut it closed once he realized he had to think about it. "Hm," he smiled while pressing his finger against his mouth, "you came up with that just now?"  
      Oswald smiled proudly and pulled at his shirt, "yes, I guess I did." He hummed and marched back into the kitchen and the Riddle Man sat not so quietly as he tried to concoct and answer. His train of thought was interrupted by the image of his roommate being proud of himself. He smiled at the way he huffed as if he knew exactly what he was doing.   
      It wasn't often his 'feathered friend' was prideful, and he's more gloomy than not, so seeing him believe he's clever enough to pull a riddle - a mind-boggling riddle at that - right from thin air was adorable, for lack of a better term.   
      And although he's a pain in the ass most of the time, Edward never really was actually pissed. Sure he was annoyed, but he never disliked Oswald, nor did he ever regret bringing him home. He was good company, and not boring in the least. He means well, and he remembers that someone else he knew tried to do something good (or right, morally or not) and failing miserably. His, however, created a ripple effect, and his friend's mistakes were only stationary; those mistakes never left the apartment. He sighed at the thought of him being himself again, his old, pathological psycho-sociopathic ways.   
      He was torn from his mind when the man-of-the-night returned to the bathroom doorway - "it's ready!" His smile was huge and legitimate, and he couldn't help but to return one.   
      He rose from the toilet and walked out into the kitchen, where a poorly iced cake was sitting, accompanied by a very necessary bottle of red and two of everything. Oswald put out his hand and motioned for him to sit.   
      They sat across from each other, and Oswald was the one who cut the cake - "this gives away the answer, doesn't it?"  
      Ed raised his shoulders happily and examined the cake. It was layered, and in each layer was a different sugary topping. The bottom-most layer was ice cream - "a perfect, solid base to a layered cake," Ed spoke. Then the one above it was warm chocolate - "so the ice cream isn't too cold, but the cake doesn't get too dry," Oswald added.   
      And the top layer, right under a cake layer and icing, "strawberry and vanilla icing -"  
      The 'chef' poured the wine, "because there's too much chocolate."  
      Edward couldn't help but to laugh; the cake was perfectly planned! Aside from one of the layers being over-baked, the only problem with it was cosmetic. "Listen, Ed," he raised his eyes from the plate. Ed raised his brows and put the glass down and listened attentively; "I know I've been a mess, especially to deal with. So," he re-presented the whole ensemble, "this is a little thank you dessert for putting up with me."  
      Edward gave a little laugh and and folded his hands, "why, this is too kind of you to do, Mr. Co-" he caught himself, "Oswald, but sincerely, the pleasure of aiding you back to health is all mine. You've, uh, given me something to look forward to when I come home from work."  
      He blushed at the comment and shyly bowed his head. His heart fluttered, until he remembered that he forgot to tell Ed something, "it's very important, I just can't seem to put my finger on it."  
      The stove caught on fire, "oh yeah - I dropped the olive oil inside the stove, which is probably stil hot."  
      Edward sighed and grabbed the half empty fire extinguisher and put out the fire. Despite being more difficult than he's worth, Ed laughed and after a moment, Oswald realized he was genuine, and he laughed with him.   
      Both of them had to admit, their lives are a lot more eventful with each other around.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> If you have a prompt or idea, leave a comment or message my tumblr @/petes-hotspot


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